Different forms of power

Inspired by Marshall Rosenberg and Brene Brown, and the HR staff of the Antwerp police, we developed the overview below of five forms of power. We found it interesting to reflect on these different forms of power and are happy to share this overview with you.

Dark red symbolises the use of power through violence and domination. The direction of the green arrow indicates that power through dialogue and consultation is preferred.

Through ‘power with(in)’ we aim to communicate from dialogue and mutual understanding. This means that everything that happens is agreed upon through consultation:

• Agreements are mutual and made with everyone’s consent.
• How people work together is coordinated. There are regular check-ins on how everyone feels about a given situation.
• Resistance and frustration lead to dialogue and a search for solutions.

Examples: giving each other feedback, evaluating projects through consultation, looking for solutions to conflicts…

The ‘power to’ variant is used when dialogue is not possible due to time constraints or when responsibility for a decision cannot be shared. Clear rules are set. Certain actions are carried out according to someone’s directives. It’s important here that:

• What needs to happen is communicated concretely.
• The “why” behind it is explained.
• It’s made clear that what’s expected contributes to long-term goals.

Examples: children go to bed at bedtime, entrepreneurs submit their accounts according to clear rules, industry workers follow strict safety regulations and cannot deviate from them, police officers carry out alcohol checks according to specific guidelines…

The ‘protective use of power’ is only used when the two previous variants don’t work. Power is used to limit damage. What matters with this variant is that the focus is on protecting, not punishing. It’s important that:

• Boundaries are communicated early on.
• The underlying reasons are repeated if needed.
• It’s clearly indicated which behaviour is unwanted.
• It’s clearly indicated what needs to happen.

Examples: giving restorative sanctions where offenders restore what they’ve damaged, removing someone from a task to prevent negative consequences, separating pupils who are fighting…

With the use of power from a ‘power over’ perspective, following rules and prohibitions happens mainly from extrinsic motivation. From a Nonviolent Communication perspective, we have significant concerns about this:

• Intrinsic motivation to do something disappears, or starts to diverge from the organisation’s goals.
• The capacity to act from a sense of responsibility is not stimulated and cannot develop.
• When organisations and structures operate from ‘power over’, an internal struggle for power emerges. This dynamic drains energy away from working on the organisation’s mission (its reason for being).
• The development of dealing with one’s own emotions and those of others is held back, and the ability to relate empathically to others is barely or not developed.
• Long-term exposure to ‘power over’ has a harmful effect on taking responsibility. Actions remain dependent on external approval.
• Acting and communicating from a desire to avoid guilt and shame leads to low self-esteem.

Perhaps this overview inspires you too, to reflect on how you want to deal with power as a parent, partner, colleague or leader…