Politicians: please stop!

I am truly worried!

I am worried when I see politicians going at each other with accusations, mud-slinging, tearing each other down. I wonder what kind of atmosphere they will have to step into when they start coalition negotiations to govern a city or municipality together. How will they enter into dialogue with each other to shape a policy that serves citizens? How will they find common ground on agreements and measures that make life more pleasant, safer? How will they, as democratically elected representatives, develop a policy that embraces all citizens?

Polarisation does not foster the kind of dialogue and curiosity I would like to see when people discuss the future of our society.

I would love to see politicians, with their public mandate, inspire people toward dialogue. Their example could spread like an oil stain. What would it look like if politicians primarily positioned themselves based on their values?

Every political discourse aims to take care of the needs and interests of certain groups. The Greens want above all a healthy, green, sustainable society. Social democrats want to take care of the socially vulnerable, families, and want the middle class to live in a welfare state. Other parties want to put the emphasis on a free society where people can be entrepreneurs, or a safe society where people are respected for their culture and customs. There is nothing wrong with politics. It is even essential to arrive at a policy through dialogue from different perspectives, one in which all interests are respected.

The needs of voters are not in conflict with each other.

By using a bit of creative common sense and above all by talking things through, we can get a long way. What is wrong with a safe, social, green society where there is respect for people living their own culture? I am sure that if politicians engage in genuine dialogue with each other, more is possible than what comes out of debating.

(As I write these words, I want to apologise to the politicians who do pay careful attention to their language. I am glad for your intention to work on policy through dialogue. We see you from time to time in our trainings. Thank you for that!)

I want to challenge politicians to let themselves be inspired by the many courses in Nonviolent and Connecting Communication that are given throughout the country. I hope they come to see that taking care of their own needs and interests works best, and is most durable, when the interests and needs of others are also taken into account. Dialogue delivers more than debate.

The suggestions I would like to make to politicians:

• Speak a language of dialogue with other politicians (and with your voters) Do not get drawn into a discourse of accusations and smear campaigns. Speak above all about your values, your interests, and which human needs you want to take care of. Make proposals and indicate that you are willing to work out solutions through consultation.
• When you disagree… When you hear proposals from other politicians that you disagree with, do not respond with demeaning language. Avoid dismissing someone with a different opinion as an idiot, incompetent, or opportunist. Instead, indicate what concerns you have about certain proposals. Share what needs and values you want to take care of in response to what the other is proposing.
• Train yourself in Connecting Communication. Learn to speak a language where consultation and dialogue come through. There are many inspiring trainings in Flanders, Brussels and Wallonia. They go a long way toward helping you speak a language that is connecting and, above all, very practical. Search for “Connecting Communication” and find a trainer that suits you. (You don’t necessarily have to come to us for that.)

Erwin